Justin Bieber Memoir Deal

No, the title of this post is not a mistake.  16 year old Justin Bieber has just inked a deal to produce a memoir in which his journey to fame is chronicled. To come up with enough material, they are going to have focus on when this kid learned to wipe his own ass and take his first steps.  Why?  Cause he is fucking 16 years old okay.  I don't give a shit how many tween fans he has, the idea of a memoir for a 16 year old is absolutely fucking ridiculous and proves how far we descended into the ridiculous.

The illustrated autobiography titled Justin Bieber: First Step 2 Forever: My Story (yep, grandiose as hell), will feature never before seen photos (gasp with glee everyone).  The book will also coincide with a 32 page comic book biography, Fame: Justin Beiber.  I guess his fans are still learning how to read, so he doesn't have to try to snag Palin's ghost writer to hook him up.  

"Every day I wake up and count my blessings. My fans have played such a large part in all of this and they help me live my dreams every day. I'm excited to share just a little bit more of my world with them through this book," the teen performer said in a release.

Translation:  I need to make as much money as I can now because when my balls drop, and my voice changes the girls may not dig me half as much.  The rest of us can only hope that someone comes up with a musical shot of penicillin to cure Beiber fever, cause if I have to hear his high pitched voice one more time, followed by the screams of adoring girls, yeah -- I am pretty much going to have to be sick.

On one final note:  I know that some of your are going to get giddy and point out that the little irritant is Canadian, but just as we pawned off Alex Trebec on the Americans, I am sure in time, we can do the same with Bieber.