Yesterday, Barrino's manager found her in the closet and was forced to call 911, when it was clear that the Idol star was not doing well. Apparently, he suggested that the added media attention due to her relationship is what lead Barrino to attempt suicide. Fortunately for Barrino's family, friends, and fans, the star survived the attempt is to be released from the hospital shortly.
When I read about this, I immediately thought about the rigeurs of fame. Prior to winning Idol, Barrino was a struggling single mother and this could not have been easy. Winning must have seemed like a dream come true and while it brought some economic relief (note: the singer almost lost her home to foreclosure), with fame of course comes the attention and stress of leading a very public life. The glare of the camera and lights is often far from pleasant. Had Barrino not been a public figure, the various issues that have cropped up in her life would have occured without notice from society.
I won't pretend to live inside Barrino's mind, but suicide is an act of desperation from which there is no return. She must have been at a very dark moment in her life to believe that this was the right choice to make. Often when we see celebrities, we assume that their wealth and fame buys them happiness, even though we have seen example after example who seem set upon a cycle of self destruction. Fantasia is more than the woman who sat on the Idol stage singing "Summertime," she is a woman that must have been dealing with a major form of depression.
Depression is the kind of illness that you cannot easily see, but what is certain is that it is a very painful thing to deal with. Having had moments of depression in my life and at times contemplated suicide, I know this pain first hand. The public scrutiny with this latest scandal may have just lit the torch paper to a fuse that had been waiting to burn for quite sometime. At the various gossip sites, commentators are suggesting that no man is worth her life, that she needs to "get it together," and one even suggested that she be the "strong Black woman she is meant to be." Repeatedly we see the same comments because no one wants to talk about depression. It does not matter what led to the eventual break, because the main culprit is depression. There is a huge refusal to connect this with Black women, because of the social myth that we are strong and able to bear any burden no matter how painful. Black women are not super human and this stereotype exists in large part to justify the oppression we face that is both race and gender specific in origin. What if you can't be the strong Black woman?
There are many Black women who don't even seek treatment because depression is too often seen as a "white thing" and yet with all the difficulties that Black women face in this life, it is highly illogical to assume for one moment that everyone is able to cope. The media will focus on the affair and the alleged sex tape because that is flashy, but because depression is anything but sexy it will not be mentioned in any of the stories, despite the obvious fact that if someone chooses to commit suicide they are clearly depressed. The media has never been interested in truly examining the difficulties that Black women face and so I suppose it is hardly a surprise that once again it is completely missing the mark. I do hope that this incident serves as a trigger for Black women that can afford to get help. You don't have to be strong, you only have to be human.
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